Time to Move On

Well, a lot has been going on since I last posted. My emotions have been all over the place over the last, well, almost month. Tomorrow, it will be one month since I divorced my ex. To be fairly honest, my emotions have been all over before that, but that's beside my point.

I've finally realized that I'm not afraid to move on. I'm not afraid to live my life and continue on the way that I know I should be. It's taken me a while, feeling like I've been held back by some imaginary chains, belts, and bars. I didn't know why I felt this way and then it hit me: I was afraid to live my life and move on to better things.

I have dreams that I want to live out - that I want to pursue. I can't do that if these imaginary bars are holding me back! I need to just let it all go and move on.

I'm so thankful to have friends and family behind me on this. One friend in particular. She has been by my side through it all and I couldn't thank her enough. I knew I could count on her with everything and she and I have been hanging out a lot more and helping each other through tough times. She's my best friend/sister and I love her to death for her support and shoulder to cry on.

I do wonder why it took me so long to realize that I can move on with my life and not keep looking over my shoulder. I know my ex isn't. He's probably off loving life as of right now. And I shouldn't let anything stop me from doing the same.

Yes, I have forgiven him, but I'm not going to back-peddle back into the relationship or anything. He and I didn't work out and I don't think that I should tear my heart apart any more than it already is by throwing myself into the lion's den by getting back into a relationship that I know is going to fail.